Friday, October 28, 2005

Let the nerve-wracking begin!

This summer, I made a slew of doctor's appointments at my clinic. The most recent was today--a follow-up for my ultrasound that took place last week. This was just a chance to go over all of the results of the ultrasound, since the technician can only report abnormalities to a physician. The appointment was scheduled for 4:00 today.

I got a message on our answering maching yesterday afternoon when I got home from school. It was my clinic, and they were wondering if I could come in at 2:30 instead of 4:00. Without thinking about it, I called back and said that the earliest I could be there (Minnetonka) was 4:00 because I wasn't able to leave my school in Coon Rapids earlier than 3:15. They said that would be fine.

So I am sitting at my desk this morning while my kids are taking a quiz, and out of nowhere I think, "Holy crap! What if they wanted me to come in early because something is wrong on the ultrasound?" Then I calmed down and heeded the wisdom of my mother, who said that they probably were just trying to fill in cancelled appointment times. Fine, that makes sense. But I still couldn't shake the fear, and I started thinking about how I haven't been feeling him move around as much as the books say I should, I have been having weird pain on the sides of my abdomen when I get out of bed in the morning, and I am STILL SO TIRED everyday.

I got to my clinic with time to spare and sat in the waiting room with a two-week-old Newsweek magazine. Come on, it was that or Golf Digest. In an OB waiting room. Go figure. But I digress. The nurse called my name in record time. I explained my surprise and how I'd had to wait an hour and a half last time I came in. She laughed. She probably thought I was exaggerating. :) She took my weight and blood pressure, and within only a few more minutes my nurse practitioner walked in. She took me through the ultrasound techno-speak and explained that everything was perfectly normal. (Yay!--I mean, I totally knew it would be).

Now--on to my concerns.
1) Not feeling him move around. Granted, I shouldn't listen to all the books and websites so closely, but it seems like people were coming out of the woodwork asking if I was feeling him like crazy. Sure, I had flutters, but they were few and far between. The logical answer? My placenta has made its home against the front wall of my uterus. It is acting like a buffer between me and the baby. Obviously, he'll eventually be big enough to feel, even through the placenta. This is also the reason my doctors always have such a hard time finding his heartbeat. They had to work around a big blob of placenta!
2) Pain on the sides of my abdomen. My doctor is dubbing this the "pain of the month." I forget what it's called, but it's totally normal. Kind of a muscle spasm deal. Anyway, just knowing that it's "normal" eases some of the pain right away.
3) STILL being tired. Yeah, there's no saying goodbye to this. Oh well. Two out of three isn't that bad.

I have three more monthly appointments. In February , my appointments occur every two weeks, and in March they are weekly. It's a little weird. I know that it's going to be here before I know it! It's so exciting.


sleeping with bread said...

Today I held my youngest grandchild in my arms . . . he was ten months yesterday . . . and I thought about your blog . . . I sooooo get all that goes with the waiting . . .

I love waiting with you!

gloria said...

I also soooo get what goes with the waiting. I think of you often. There is nothing quite like this experience of a human life growing within us. Even the third time through is filled with fear, amazement, joy, nerves, anticipation. Aaaarrgh!
Thanks for sharing your story with us!